ISBN e-book: 978-1-61213-387-4
Dawn Sims has made a name for herself writing romantic fiction online. When she’s pushed to try her hand at publishing, she thinks she has everything figured out. The only problem? She’s never been in a relationship, especially one that has led her to finding The Big O.
So much for writing what you know.
Warner Green has had Dawn in his sights since she walked into his class in seventh grade. She broke his teenage heart not once, but twice, so seeing her in his night class at the local community college was an unexpected surprise.
Accidentally reading her bad erotica on her laptop was a blessing from the Smut Gods themselves.
It’s clear she has no idea what she’s writing about, but Warner does. In fact, he knows so much that he’s willing to offer her his services. The deal is simple: teach the good girl from high school everything she needs to know to write from experience. If he gets to live out a fantasy or two that he’s been harboring for almost a decade, then there’s no harm in that either.
The lessons turn more heated, and Dawn begins to question where Warner has learned his skills, but he’s not ready to talk, until his past comes back to haunt him at the worst possible time.
It shouldn’t matter when it’s for authentication purposes only.
Shifting a little to look at him, I resisted the urge to kick him in the nuts and lick his neck at the same time. I mean he looked pretty hot sitting in my chair eating that muffin. Stupid handsome face and fornication hair paired with what I assumed were dirty jeans and a plaid flannel.“Fine. I’m going to buy a vibrator with the money you gave me. Happy?”
His smile was in full force now. “Hell yeah, I’m happy. Ecstatic, even.” He chewed around the pastry in his mouth and laughed. “I’ll come with you to make sure you get the right one.”
“Oh, hell no. Being with you in a porn shop is on my list of Things to Never Do before I Die.”
A true child of music, Amber’s parents surrounded her with the loudest beats they could find, molding her into a girl who found inspiration and meaning in lyrics and chords. Raised on John Hughes movies, Luck Dragons, and pirate ships, she dreamed of love and adventure. When Amber began to create her own world, she envisioned a place where Happy Ever Afters do exist. Since then, she has authored several romance novels, all of which focus on songs and the way they can touch people’s lives. Music may not be able to fix a broken heart, but it can provide one hell of a soundtrack for healing.A full-time wife and mother with a full-time job, Amber finds her muse in everyday life and the people who bring her inspiration.
Be sure to look for Amber’s other books!
Dawn Sims has been writing romantic fanfiction online for a while. Bolstered by the encouragement of her fans, she strikes out to write a novel…and quickly learns that she sucks at writing smut. Warner Green comes across her very poorly written sex scene and knows that whatever God exists is smiling down on him. He has had a thing for Dawn since the first day he spotted her in middle school. She broke his heart, but he never could forget her, and now is his opportunity to cash in his years of waiting. He offers Dawn string-free smut lessons. After all, she can’t write a full range of smut if she hasn’t experienced it for herself, right? When Dawn agrees to this, he is beyond happy. But soon, Dawn starts to wonder where all his sexual prowess stems from and is asking questions he’d rather not answer. As the two grow closer, will they make it work or is the relationship doomed to always be for authentication purposes?
I could relate to Dawn pretty easily. Now, for all of you wondering, I’m not secretly typing away writing smutty fanfics online in my spare time (spare time? Between work and blogging and reading and reviewing, I HAVE NO SPARE TIME. I don’t know how people with kids get anything accomplished). I just understand the whole “I was the smart one in high school, but ended up not doing anything academically” thing. Of course, Dawn flunked out of college and I just never finished, so there are some differences, but I still understand her mentality. Her attempt at writing a romance novel was atrocious. I was immediately worried when I started this.
I really thought the opening scene was the intro and that the novel would progress in that manner. That thought was not appealing. Luckily, that is not the case. Dawn has a long way to go until she is up to my standard for romance novels.
But she was pretty entertaining to watch.
Warner was the character I loved immediately. He was cute and funny and confident and completely annoying. I love that whole I’m going to annoy you into loving me bit. It really amuses me. He just amuses me in general. He’s adorable and sweet, a combination I’m a complete sucker for.
What I loved about this is that it’s exactly what it sounds like. Amusing, smut filled scenes with a deeper story hiding behind. I love books that make me laugh. Actually, it’s pretty much a requirement for me to love a novel. I read to escape and escaping should make me happy. Smiles are the physical manifestation of happy. That’s the biggest part of this for me. It was amusing smut. How can you not love amusing smut? Warner and Dawn get it on and then Dawn starts to fall for him just a little. He just falls harder (hehehe) for her. This contains that teenage boy humor that we all kinda roll our eyes at, but internally giggle along with.
What I didn’t love? Well, it feels a bit under-developed. I read an ARC, so it’s quite possible that this has been polished up and added to and my problem is irrelevant, but it felt too short. The scene changes were a bit abrupt and all the scenes with Warner’s friends had an unfinished feel. Like it was missing a few extra lines of dialogue or action of some kind. Also, I hate the word jizz.
Seriously, there probably is not a euphemism for semen that I care for, but jizz just might be my least favorite. This is a problem for me with all romance novels. I hate the euphemisms. They all suck. I realize that the normal medical terms are determinedly unsexy, but I’ve yet to read a good alternative!
Really, this is exactly what the title implies, amusing smut. Sure, it delves into a deeper level, but I requested it for the smut (and because of the pretty cover) and I wasn’t disappointed. If you are looking for something to make you laugh or just not your typical romance novel, this is for you!
****Thank you to The Writer’s Coffee Shop Publishing House for providing me with an eARC via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review****
Bows & Bullets Reviews 