Review for Fashionably Dead (Hot Damned #1) by Robyn Peterman

Fashionably Dead by Robyn Peterman

TITLE: Fashionably Dead
SERIES: Hot Damned #1
AUTHOR: Robyn Peterman
NARRATOR: Jessica Almasy
PUBLICATION DATE: February 9, 2016
PUBLISHER: Audible Studios
LENGTH: 12 hours 14 minutes
FORMAT: Audiobook
SOURCE: Review copy via Audible
RATING: 3 bows

Summary from Audible:

Vampyres don’t exist. They absolutely do not exist. At least I didn’t think they did ’til I tried to quit smoking and ended up Undead. Who in the hell did I screw over in a former life that my getting healthy equates with dead? Now I’m a Vampyre. Yes, we exist whether we want to or not. However, I have to admit, the perks aren’t bad. My girls no longer jiggle, my ass is higher than a kite, and the latest Prada keeps finding its way to my wardrobe. On the downside, I’m stuck with an obscenely profane Guardian Angel who looks like Oprah and a Fairy Fighting Coach who’s teaching me to annihilate like the Terminator. To complicate matters, my libido has increased to Vampyric proportions, and my attraction to a hotter-than-Satan’s-underpants killer rogue Vampyre is not only dangerous…it’s possibly deadly. For real dead.
Permanent death isn’t on my agenda. Avoiding him is my only option. Of course, since he thinks I’m his, it’s easier said than done. Like that’s not enough to deal with, all the other Vampyres think I’m some sort of Chosen One. Holy hell, if I’m in charge of saving an entire race of blood suckers, the Undead are in for one hell of a ride.

Alrighty, so I was in the mood for something to make me laugh when I started this. That’s all I wanted, something funny. In that regard this succeeds wholeheartedly. Despite the other issues I had with it, it did have me snickering and smiling through-out the majority of it. It was everything else that I had issues with.

My biggest issue is this is it was too over-the-top. Everything was just too much. Every person Astrid meets is either a celebrity look-a-like or so insanely hot. I know the whole vampyre thing makes people more attractive, it’s part of the lure apparently but am I the only one sick of novels with only pretty people? Where are the normal looking people? Or just the pretty people? You know, you don’t have to be inhumanly gorgeous to be attractive. You don’t have to be physically flawless to be attractive.

The sexual tension between Astrid and Ethan was also quite eye-roll inducing. I get it. He’s hot, you are hot, you want to have lots and lots of sex despite the obvious issues with the possible relationship. But does that fact and the obvious attraction have to be the sole focus?

::sigh:: I honestly don’t think it was the book that was the problem. I think it’s me. I think my tastes have changed. I’m getting very sick of the all pretty cast of people who only want sex where each encounter is more mind-blowing than the last. I have read that story over and over. I want something new and different.

Basically if you are looking for a funny read with wacky characters and a celebrity-obsessed heroine, this is for you. If you are looking for a hot and sexy hero who can rile the heroine up like no one else, this is for you?

Audio Notes:
Jessica Almasy does a good job narrating. She’s not my favorite narrator, but she has good pacing and varies her voice enough to get the point across. I’m definitely interested in listening to more of her work!

****Thank you to Esther Bochner at Audible for providing me with an audio copy in exchange for an honest review****

3 bows
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